Welcome to my mind.

Hi, I'm Jenny.

  • Gf: babe come over
  • Me: I'm eating garlic bread
  • Gf: I'm horny and my parents aren't home
  • Me: it's the kind that's covered in cheese

lvrnemalvo:

monobeartheater:

arcticmowsy:

aerostarmonk:

The man entered his home and was absolutely delighted when he discovered someone had stolen every lamp in the house.

oh my god

i just do not understand this post what even

OH MY FUCKING GOD

(via twofigures-byafountain)

stability:

when my kids ask where babies come from im just gonna show them this gif

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(via ohheckingshit)

thesorrovv:

ma’am im sorry but that baby was due today, i don’t care if its not done just turn in what you have

(via gremlinprincess)

meladoodle:

*walks up to newborn baby* haha fuckin virgin

(Source: meladoodle, via hate)

hophigh:

inner—utopia:

Bless that one person in every group that is like “keep going, I’m listening” and encourages you to finish your story even when everyone else is talking over you.

(via sassbitchofficial)

miss-jaxon-flaxon-waxon:

onwardwall:

thegingerbalrog:

my-fandom-life:

dismantlerepaired:

whereismystrawberrytart:

hikingnerd:

timelordpillbug:

follovved:

amerlcanapparel:

when she says she doesn’t send nudes

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when guys objectify women and expect them to send nudesimage

when someone asks you about your nuclear plans for russia

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When Russia sends you nudes

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(via gremlinprincess)